


how can I just let you walk away

by lightningcanary



Category: Blindspot (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-19
Updated: 2018-08-21
Packaged: 2019-06-29 21:07:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15737367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lightningcanary/pseuds/lightningcanary
Summary: missing "scene" from 3x22





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Idk if someone has written this already (idk if I have written it ahagafad) but anyway, I felt the need to write this, so... I wrote it in 10 minutes so I'm sorry if it's terrible...

Patterson is walking towards Reade's office but she comes to a halt when she sees Tasha getting out of there. Her lips turn up at first, since she didn't expect to see the brunette in the office after she got fired the day before, but then she sees how tense Tasha looks as she walks to the elevator, and she frowns. To the naked eye, it looks like nothing is wrong, but Patterson knows her enough to know that something is actually very wrong.

She feels the urge to follow her and ask her if she's okay, but she remembers that she's not supposed to care, that she needs some space, because she can't pour her heart out to her again, not yet. She can't let her break her heart again.

She looks back towards Reade to find him staring at Tasha's back with his own frowning face. He looks angry, she thinks.

Patterson wonders what happened between them. If something happened. She hates the mere thought. She needs to know. She thinks about asking him, but, screw it, Tasha is her best friend, she should ask _her_. And she wants her back in her life.

She turns towards the elevator just in time to lock eyes with Tasha, who closes her eyes after looking at her sadly and letting go of a shuddering breath, before the elevator doors close.

Patterson feels a weight in her stomach as she stares at the closed doors for several minutes. She doesn't know what it is, but something is wrong and she can't help but feel like she's not gonna see her again. Like that last look was a goodbye.


	2. how can you just walk away from me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this happened... It's very hard on a few scenes from the last episode of friends that just fit so well...

Tasha is back. Six months later, she's back.

Apparently, she was never fired from the CIA, they just needed an excuse for her to disappear. Apparently, she has been on an undercover mission for those six months, no contact with her past allowed.

She lied to them, multiple times. She betrayed them but they get it. She didn't have a choice and, after all, they weren't on their best terms since they found out she had been hiding Borden was alive.

None of that bothers Patterson. Not anymore. What bothers her is the fact that everyone knew Tasha was leaving, everyone got some sort of goodbye. Everyone except her.

She had seen Tasha and Reade talking that day. He never told them what she said. And a few days later, while they were at Weller's having drinks, Jane let it slip that Tasha had gone to her that day and told her that she was glad to have worked with her and hugged her. Hearing it, Kurt remembered that he also had a weird conversation with her that morning. She had thanked him for everything and when he had mentioned watching the game together that weekend, she simply smiled sadly and told him that maybe another time before giving him a hug too. But the worst is, when Rich reveals that he, too, was approached by the woman. She told him that she couldn't believe she was saying that but she would miss him. Rich! She said goodbye to Rich! She said goodbye to Rich but not to her.

Was she that irrelevant? Tasha couldn't find five minutes to go see her? She was supposed to be her best friend! Sure, they were still not fully back on track, but they were trying.

She's upset. No, she's not upset. She's mad. She knows she deserves better.

So she has been avoiding Tasha since she came back. One week ago.

She's been avoiding Tasha until the woman finds her in the abandoned room Rich showed her, that now she uses to think when she needs to be alone, and blocks the way when Patterson tries to get past her with a lame excuse.

"No. You're not going anywhere," Tasha says, crossing her arms. "Not until to listen to me. Look, I know. I know I was an asshole, that I lied to all of you, that I betrayed you, but I didn't have a choice! I coul--"

"I understand that," Patterson interrupts her, annoyed, wanting to get out of there.

"Then why are you avoiding me?!"

"I'm not!"

"Yes, you are! What did I do?"

"You did... nothing," Patterson says, a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

"What?"

"Just let me out of here, Zapata," Patterson huffs.

"Patterson," she pleads. But Patterson is just getting more and more annoyed and, worst of all, she knows Tasha is getting to her. "I can't apologize if I don't know what's wrong."

Patterson sighs, exhausted. "You want to know what's wrong? Like you do care now?"

"What? Of course I do! What are you talking about?!"

"I'm talking about six months ago! You know, when you decided to disappear from all our lives. Oh, no, but wait! You at least had the decency to say goodbye to your friends! You know, you talked to Reade, to Jane, to Kurt." Tasha looks down guiltily, finally understanding what this is about. "You talked to fucking RICH!! You said goodbye to everyone EXCEPT FOR FUCKING ME! I don't get a goodbye?!" she asks, incapable of keeping her emotions at bay anymore as her voice breaks.

Tasha opens her mouth, but doesn't find anything to say. Her lower lip trembles before she closes her mouth again and looks away, eyes closing in the progress.

"W-what do you have to do to get a goodbye?" she says, lower now. "Be your teammate? Hang out with you after work? Be your BEST friend?! Oh wait, I did ALL those things!" she exclaims as a few tears threaten to fall from her eyes and Tasha's eyes are closed tightly and her head hanging. "You know, after all we've been through," she says before Tasha straightens and opens her eyes to look at her, eyes shining with unshed tears. "I thought you at least cared a little."

And with that she's out of the room, leaving a stunned Zapata behind, and feeling the tears in her eyes escape against her will.

It's not until she has reached the elevator at SIOC that Tasha catches up to her again.

"You really think I didn't say goodbye to you because I don't CARE?!" she asks, visibly hurt, after taking Patterson's wrist to turn her around to face her, apparently not caring where they are and who can hear them.

"That's what it felt like," Patterson says a little more calm now that she's not holding in the tears.

Tasha breathes out. "I can't believe that after ten years you still don't get it."

"So why didn't you say something then!?" Patterson asks as more tears fall down her cheeks.

"BECAUSE IT WAS TOO HARD, PATTERSON! I can't even begin to explain how much I've missed you!Because when I thought about not seeing you everyday, even if you weren't talking to me, not knowing when or if I would see you again, it made me not want to go, okay!? So it was easier to just leave, because otherwise I would have stayed. So if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else?! YOU'RE WRONG. It's because you mean MORE to me! IT'S BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE YOU! And I can't even begin to imagine my life without you. So there you have it." She turns around and starts to leave, leaving a dumbfounded Patterson this time, much like Patterson had just done to her.

"TASH!" she shouts as soon as she gets out of it, afraid she's gonna disappear again.

"WHAT?" Zapata replies, turning around.

Patterson, completely lost for words, opens and closes her mouth a few times before lurching into Tasha's and and kissing her desperately. It takes Tasha a few seconds to control her balance and a few more to realize that Patterson is kissing her and kiss her back, just as desperately.

Shortly after, they separate as abruptly as they started kissing and stare at each other, catching their breaths. A few seconds of eye contact are enough for Tasha to slowly lean back in into a gentler and deeper kiss.


End file.
